I sometimes wish there was a test to tell you which way you lean.
Not physically, in case you have a limp. Not even from a romantic point of view. But political. Things change. People change. It’s not always easy to tell who is supporting what any more, and as a result it’s not easy for me to always see so black and white (I suppose I see things in shades of red). I was a Democrat in the States. In fact, I was a bleeding heart liberal (I never saw the insult in the “bleeding heart” of the liberal – I cared, I bled, so?) I think I’m significantly less bloody of the heart now, but how different? I was a Lib Dem/Labour supporter in the UK (I would go Labour but the Millibands creep me out, and although I am not a Tory I don’t have a problem that they are Eton-educated Conserative establishment. They’re clever and rich and went to school there. And? It’s not like any political leaders have much in common with me, just add them to the list.) And now I don’t really know what I am now. I’m staunchly not Tea Party nor British National Party (writes the foreign immigrant). I’m staunchly not Monster Raving Loony Party (yes, that’s real).
But am I staunchly anything?
And is there a test to tell me what I am?
I would imagine it needs to contain the following (and for the avoidance of doubt, these are my preferences, I am not pushing them on anyone else nor am I judging. Also, to be clear I get that some of them need answers for how they’re to be done, and I’m not addressing this in my test of what party I should be):
- I believe in state-run, tax-payer subsidized healthcare that allows access for medical treatment to everyone (we can simply call this one “I believe in the NHS”)
- I am pro-choice
- I am anti-death penalty
- I believe that children should be vaccinated
- I believe in welfare
- I also believe that there should be noticeable reduction in the number of people on welfare (she writes, having known someone who was on welfare all their adult life because they said (and I quote) “I would work, but working can be stressful.”)
- I believe popsicles shouldn’t have wooden sticks in them because I can’t stand the feel of my teeth against them.
- I believe countries should be obligated to invest in renewable energy sources and should be penalized for inappropriate over-usage of dinosaur fuels
- I believe that if I have it as a right, then a gay or lesbian couple should have the exact same right
- I believe in gun control
- I believe that tea parties are for children and their imaginary bunnies
- I believe in one piece swimsuits for young children
- I believe in reducing debt to protect the future
- I believe in the local production of goods and not importing everything under the sun
- I believe that education should be compulsory until the age of 18
- I believe that global warming is real and that we should all stop being assholes about it
- I believe that people on long-term unemployment who are holding out for management positions should have a reality check
- I believe that if a man and a woman working in a company with the same skill set and ratings should be paid the same amount, and if they aren’t then the company should be fined heavily for being twats
- I believe that women who force new mothers to break down in tears over their choices of breastfeeding or bottle feeding should serve jail time (or at least be subjected to 12 uninterrupted hours of Spice Girls per tear-inducing comment)
- I believe Pop-Tarts should be unfrosted
- I believe a postcode lottery system for fertility funding should be scrapped and a more balanced system put in place
- I believe if one has a 4×4 then they’d better be fucking using it to go off-road and herd some cows
- I believe the physio and rehabilitation therapy should be more readily available to get people mobile, healthy, and back to work
- I believe you can never be too prepared for a zombie invasion
- I believe that if a woman can do it, a man can too
- I believe university educations should be free (like they used to be)
- I believe governments have the responsibility to look after its people and I believe its people have the responsibility to no take the piss
- I believe in the Scandinavian style of maternity and paternity leave – up to a year of paid leave and the dad is required by law to have one month of that leave
- I believe in the Scandinavian style of nursery care as well
- I believe discrimination due to religion, sex, skin color, relationship preferences, or length of your toes in any situation – school, jobs, airport scans, vending of hot dogs – should be illegal
- I believe the extended weather forecast is one of the most important screen checks of the day
- I believe those little laws put in place that require warrants before conversations get listened to and emails get read should be put back in place
- I believe that religion has absolutely no place whatsoever in school systems or in government
- I believe that if the title has “Desperate Housewives” in it then the show should be cancelled
- I believe in evolutionism
- I believe everyone should be literate, and further to that every child should be encouraged to read every single day
- I believe that in a fight between Batman and Superman it’d be close but Batman would ultimately win
- I believe that countries are ultimately rather like (but not exactly like) big businesses, however they have a duty of care to their “employees” that corporations today do not need to command
- I believe that womanhood and motherhood are not mutually exclusive, but neither do they have to be definitions
- I believe that taxpayers have obligations to society (including the education system) to ensure that future generations don’t wind up pointlessly rioting in London (or insert large city of choice in its place)
- I believe that exotic animals shouldn’t be pets, nor should animals that are the size of a teacup be carried around in handbags as an accessory
- I believe in government by the people and for the people, but I also think direct democracy is a shower of shit
- I believe there should be something for people like me – people who are sick of criminals getting away with it, sick of promises that politicians (across all parties) don’t keep, sick of being told what’s best for us when the truth is, most politicians seem to have lost touch with what’s best for us.
So what party does that make me? Am I blue? Am I red? I have no idea. Am I missing anything that I should be believing in? I know that I’m pretty damn sick of all the grey political areas so far (and thank God Facebook has that “hide this story” feature).
-S.
PS – note, this isn’t a post to attack any specific candidates or posts. I’m not writing to flash anyone up or piss anyone off (and please, withhold the death threats, eh?) This is me genuinely wondering which box I would tick in an election. Genuinely wondering.
You not blue, your not red…your a combo of both…so PURPLE?
Purple! I’m in.
I find myself increasingly purple. And laughing at the morons on both sides.
And I am 100% with you on the Batman over Superman.
Purple is the new black!
Well, here, let me help you out! Apparently, I’m a flaming liberal…according to this. I was with you up until the unfrosted pop tarts – that should just be an occasional thing, and then the unfrosted pop-tart should be toasted and buttered. See, we do need more freedom than a democracy allows.
http://www.pbs.org/newshour/rundown/2012/08/where-do-you-fit-introducing-the-pewnewshour-political-party-quiz.html
That quiz had me as a screaming liberal democrat, basically as far as the gauge goes! Maybe I’ve not mellowed. Join me for a flaming liberal drink?
Amen to all of those beliefs!
Whilst I’m upset I’m not allowed to vote in the general elections this country, to be quite honest even if I could vote I’m not sure I’d know who to vote for… The Lib Dems are just lying liars who lie, Milliband is a muppet (I mean one of the actual muppets), and I just could not ever bring myself to vote Tory. Sigh.
Yeah, I can’t vote Tory. I can finally vote but when the next election comes, like you, I’m not sure who to vote for!
I’m not sure entirely sure how the red blue system breaks down in the U.K so assigning a precise color value is out of my grasp! Some shade of purple fo certain but using the US version, a very blue purple – perhaps even a navy blue!
I do see a good numbr of things listed that in reality would be hugely contradictory to “I believe in reducing debt to protect the future.”
Oh yeah, don’t get me wrong – I’m marching around with ideologies here, what I am unable to articulate is how to fund a lot of it. Rather, I guess, like the politicians. I think of Tory as blue and Labour as red here, is that off?
As far as US politics goes, you’re a large “D” Democrat, small “l” liberal, but distinguish yourself from Dems in Congress because you have a spine and not a vertical empty space. I say this because I know that by every test, I am a large D/small l, and I believe in everything you said except the bit about Pop-tarts, because Wildberry is delicious. I don’t know what that makes you outside of the States, since outside of the States, it’s not only considered impolite to accuse the President of being a socialist, but if he were one, nobody would give a shit. And people like Michelle Bachmann are put in psychiatric hospitals where they belong.
I actually refer to myself as a Morganthau liberal, both because calling myself the D-word associates me with the jellyfish in Congress and because my policy beliefs tend to be rooted in the idea that actors follow the principles of realism (rooted in the two human instincts that affect all actions, the need for survival and the need to procreate) and it is the task of leaders to weigh the collective moral compass of the people against absolute state interest.
But yeah, by US standards, you are as blue as a Smurf. I don’t know what your eligibility is to vote absentee, and I’m not going to encourage you to vote one way or the other, but please do vote. It kills me when people say they’re not voting because they don’t like either side. Every time someone chooses not to vote, it’s like giving the finger to political dissidents in Burma. Or to women in Saudi Arabia. My belief is that if you truly cannot pick a lesser of two evils, pick based on the likelihood of a Supreme Court vacancy in the next presidential term and whether you’d like to retain control of your uterus (or something more relevant to whomever I’m talking).
Oops. I might have accidentally encouraged you to vote a certain way, there. I’d regret it, but I don’t.
“you are as blue as a Smurf”
Best. Image. Ever.
I don’t think I can vote now – my driver’s license is bust and I am not really a resident. Need to research how emigrants can vote. If we can….
I am almost certain you can vote in federal elections, but the best bet to be sure is to contact the US Embassy.
Helpful linkies:
https://vhd.overseasvotefoundation.org/
http://www.fvap.gov/
I believe under UOCAVA you have the right to vote so long as you don’t renounce your citizenship or commit a felony.
There is a test – you can find it here: http://www.politicalcompass.org/
Have Fun
No wonder I am so unimpressed by our choices in htis election. I am 180degrees seperated from both Obama and Romney on this test. Obama and Romney are almost twins in the test.
Thanx
Oooh, good test. Apparently I rank at the same level as the Dalai Lama. Blue it is.
You and me both…
Of course Batman would win, duh.
And you had me until the Pop-Tarts. Sigh…guess we will just have to agree to disagree.
Come on! Naked Pop-Tart! What’s not to like?
I’ll tell you what’s not to like-frosting! Because on a naked Pop-Tart there isn’t any, and I love me some frosting.
You think pop tarts should be unfrosted!? I can’t even imagine.
I don’t want to identify myself either way politically. At this point both sides make me want to throw my hands in the air and give up all together.
All we are saaaaaaaayyying….is give unfrosted a chaaaaaaaaance….
Another test on nolanchart.com
Many (ok most) consider me an unrepentant liberal. However I am like you not sure where I fit in re: typical American Red-Blue political lanscape. Nolan Chart test places me as a centrist. Purple per se.
Re: Liberal. Great book. “God and other famous liberals” by Forrester Church.
Holy shitsnacks! I agree with. Every. Single. Point you’ve made. If you’re purple, then I’m purple right along with you.
Come join me. I brought wine.
Sounds pretty blue to me…assuming blue means liberal there as it does here. : ) I’m less red than I once was, but still red.
The areas you don’t sound blue in, no one should sound blue in. Unemployment/welfare shouldn’t be a way of life; every child should learn to read; the budget should be balanced; and discrimination against anyone (within reason) is bad (let’s face it, we have to discriminate against pedophiles & where we let them work & live).
Here’s what I think would solve our financial problems. Since 90% of politicians are lawyers, lawyers should have to pay the difference to balance a budget. If the U.S. is 1 Trillion dollars over budget this year, levy a tax against attorneys nationwide to come up with that $1T. We’d see liberals, conservatives, and centerists working together so well & so fast it would astound us. I’m just sayin’, lawyers got us into this mess; let’s insist they get us out of it.
Now, now. I don’t think it’s fair to say that unemployment and welfare as a way of life, an unbalanced budget, illiterate children, and discrimination are part of the Democratic platform. Those aren’t red or blue issues, they’re common sense issues and the pushback on policies to regulate/make progress are not political. They’re roadblocks thrown up by an incompetent, self-serving, cowardly bunch of (largely) men. Hence my support of term limits for Congress. Likewise, I believe all Congresspersons should be required to take the citizenship test as an awful lot of them are apparently unfamiliar with basic principles of law and democracy. And sex-ed should be required for all new members.
See, now, if I wasn’t worried it would give Shannon an aneurism, that all would have been said at a progressively increasing octave and decibel, accompanied by arm waving and hopping up and down. But I’m curbing my compulsive need to have throwdown political debates because I would be quite sad if I drove her crazy.
Nope, no aneurism here. Rock on, D. I am generally always on par with your comments and politics and I completely agree on term limits for Congress (and unfrosted Pop-Tarts? Where do you stand?)
Pop-Tarts without frosting is like french fries without ketchup. What’s the point?
D,
For the sake of brevity, my comment may not have been clear enough. Traditionally it was liberals who were financially irresponsible (it was a liberal House & Senate that used the massive stockpile of money from Social Security back in the 60s & 70s for social programs). Likewise, it was a liberal House & Senate who established unemployment & welfare (both very good things) but left it open to become a way of life for many. Our school system is very liberal, and those are the people advancing kids through the system who can’t read. And I included discrimination (even though liberals have generally been the more inclusive party), because now Christians are starting to be discriminated against, even though they’re still a majority in America.
While I sometimes fail, I never intentionally offend. I apologize if I offended you. I’d be glad to hear your rebut on these comments if you want to reply.
Charles,
God, a liberal? A center-ist maybe, but not a liberal. Too many major liberal issues conflict with what God’s Word says to label him a liberal. I’d say the same for conservatism too.
In fact, God incarnate (aka Jesus) steered clear of politics when He was here…probably because He didn’t support either one whole-heartedly.
Soloman,
Suggest you get the book. Dr. Church makes a convincing argument. He uses a rather classical defination rather than the present political defination.
Great book as is another of his “The Seven Deadly Virtues”.
Charles,
I might get the book; I don’t mind reading books aside from the Bible about Jesus as long as they’re accurate. The problem I had was (as you pointed out) “liberal” means something today that Jesus couldn’t be a part of whole-heartedly.
Then again, so does “conservatism.” That’s why I said he’d probably be a centerist and steer clear of politics if He was here today. : )
Soloman, I do heartliy recommend the book. “God and other famous liberals” Dr. Church was senior pastor at All Souls Church in NYC. His other book I liked was “Seven Deadly virtues:”
If you do get an read please share your views and thought with me either here or directly. Shannon has my email from my comments.
I got major shivers when you wrote “- I believe popsicles shouldn’t have wooden sticks in them because I can’t stand the feel of my teeth against them.” — I can’t stand those wooden sticks or the squeeze of cotton balls. Same category for me.
Also, sorry, but TOTALLY disagree on the unfrosted Pop Tarts. That is a travesty. :-)
See? I know! The wooden sticks! So not on!
My favorite thing about this thread is not that people here want to tear me apart for my politics, your issue is with my choice of Pop-Tarts. I love you guys. No really. I do.
I just saw a sign on Facebook I tried to copy and paste on here but it won’t let me, so I will type it out
Republican party (with a line through it)
Democrat party (with a line through it)
COCKTAIL PARTY!
-
Yes! And with James “Ragin’ Cajun” Carville and Mary Matalin on board, you know it’s got to be fun.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ULGnAZU5SIg
http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0912/80653.html?hp=r10
(I really wish those two would adopt me)
Best. Sign. Ever!!!!
I can’t eat poptarts anymore..too sweet. But back in my pop-tart days – unfrosted, toasted and buttered was definitely the way to go.
Now..on to more imporant things. What do you know about zombies that you aren’t telling us???? I cannot deal with an implied zombie outbreak.
Clearly we are of the same party. Except for poptarts (ick, whether iced or uniced) and Batman/Superman (he’s SUPER, he’ll WIN).
I offended by your pop-tart politics!!!!
What is Scandanavian style nursery?
Shannon,
I’ve selected the “Notify me of follow-up comments by email.” block twice and haven’t gotten an e-mail to confirm my selection. If that’s by design, I’m ok with that; but I wanted to let you know in case there’s something wrong with it.
I am in total harmony with you over one piece swimsuits for young kids. For that one alone I can forgive all the other differences. :)
I am in total harmony with you over one piece swimsuits for young kids. For that one alone I can forgive all the other differences. ;)
Pop Tarts should be strawberry…and frosted. We’re good on everything else. I’m in the same spot with you and D. Lama on the test. When I note how far apart “politicians” are from that spot. I sigh.
Hi- great post.
I have used many of the ideas in a post of mine- they were well articulated- much more so than me, and served as a really good springboard.
I hope you don’t mind that I have done this ( I can’t put a link to the post because it is still under constructions, but it is on the websitre above)- I have made sure that you are credited at the beginning- but if there are issues please contact me
[...] saw this on Everyday Stranger, and like the idea so much I brought it [...]
Vote Shannon!