It’s not escaped anyone’s attention that the Christmas holidays are just around the corner.
It starts in my heart with next week, with Thanksgiving. A holiday that means so much to the 300+ million people on one side of the Atlantic, on this side it’s just another Thursday in a gloomy November wrap. It used to bum me out, this Thanksgiving non-existence. I would get maudlin and watch “Home For the Holidays” and eat macaroni and cheese and miss the day that means nothing to anyone outside of America.
But I’ve been away now for going on 13 years. A third of my life has been spent outside of America, and with that amount of time comes an roomier space inside my chest. Thanksgiving means what you want it to, and for me this coming Thanksgiving will be like any other day – work (where we have an audit no less), the twins, walking the dog, Alastair has a class that night so he’ll be home late. And this time I don’t need “Home For the Holidays” and its carb companion. I’ll spend some time on the cross-trainer that evening (thank you, eBay). I’ll make a sensible dinner and, with a glass of wine, I may just tuck into my DVDs of “Doctor Who”. I won’t need to feel blue and alienated because Thanksgiving will be what I make it. We were going to host a big Thanksgiving dinner but opted out, and we thought about going away for the weekend but opted to not spend money just now. Thanksgiving will drift away past me, and it’s ok. It’s really ok.
The same is lining up for Christmas. After a turbulent family affair last year (which saw a number of people feeling fairly alienated and uncomfortable) this year is being done on our terms. Alastair has a few Christmas parties. I have a few, including one black tie event and one day that I’ve taken off of work, where two of my friends and I who survived a project a long time ago (we call each other veterans) and I are going to wear black tie and attend a musical theatre matinee. Christmas is going to be just Alastair, me, and the twins (Jeff and Melissa are with us every other year on Christmas, this is one of the off years). Christmas Eve we usually have lasagne, and we leave out mince pies and sherry for Santa and carrots for his reindeer.
We’ve bought more Christmas decorations, including more lights (you can never have too many!) and a new twinkly star for the tree (as two little people stated that our tree previously had no star – which they’re right about – and expressed how very much they wanted one). I’m thinking new stockings may be on the menu for the grown-ups (the twins’ are from their grandmother and they’re amazing). I’m going put Christmas decorations on anything that doesn’t move and, in the case of the dog, on some things that do. Further, our three amazing snowmen are going to be matched up with a new addition. My folks have gotten their hands on a giant light-up Santa Claus who’s making his way over, and for December our miserly attitude towards lighting and heat is on hold while we light this place up like Vegas.
Christmas day is going to be different this year, too. The morning will start with champagne and orange juice as we all open our stockings in bed together. We’ll go downstairs, where Father Christmas has arranged to get the twins the Christmas presents they specifically requested, down to the last detail (Nora’s was easy, Nick’s took work – he wants a “large lorry that carries logs and it must be green”. As you know, their requests become my missions and I am patting myself on the back for finally finding his present and it’s completely to his specifications.) Their Santa gifts will be under the tree in a giant velvet Santa bag that my folks gave us years ago, and we make sure Santa requests are always delivered in the Santa bag.
Their gifts from us have me prancing around with excitement, because under the Christmas tree will be a giant Sylvanian Families dollhouse for Nora, complete with working electrical lights. Nick’s gift is a large train set that we will set up under the tree, as well as a pirate ship with lots of bits to move and sails to raise. Does it get any more classical Christmas than a dollhouse and a trainset under the tree? I’m thinking no.
We’ll spend the day in our pajamas and watch the fabulous Christmas TV that is always on. The twins will play, we’ll all open gifts, and at some point we’ll make Christmas dinner for four (we’re thinking goose, mostly because I’ve never had it and I’m working my way through the carnivore tree). We’ll have Christmas crackers (last year we had ones filled with reindeer that we raced) and we’ll wear our paper crowns and we will skip Christmas pudding because none of us like it. I’m thinking ice cream, or biscuits and cheese. There won’t be family arguments or people wanting to watch different things on TV, or getting drawn into discussions on politics or mobile phones. It’s just us. The adults and two little people who have that amazing sparkle that can only be known as “Still Believing in Santa”.
For the first time in some years it really, genuinely, feels like Christmas.
And that feeling is incredible.
-S.
PS – and yes, I will also be publishing Christmas posts. It isn’t Christmas without them.
This is the perfect Christmas. Just you and yours and nobody else! All doing exactly what you want to do. Guaranteed to be a wonderful day, full of memories for all.
I look forward to your Christmas posts every year…
glad to hear you’re celebrating on your terms.
last night, I uninvited all the people who normally spend Thanksgiving with us. Nothing against them, I just don’t want to spend my Thanksgiving with anyone but my husband this year. I really agonized over how to uninvite people who weren’t invited, but have just always come to Thanksgiving at our place. I likely stepped on toes. I don’t care. My terms for this holiday.
Cheers!
I used to say it was the Coca Cola Christmas trucks commercial that made it Christmas – but then I moved to Europe and stopped watching TV. These days, I think it’s your Christmas posts that really make it Christmas. Looking forward to this year’s!
I found the perfect Christmas gift for you! (I hope the link works, since I can’t copy and paste on my phone and will have to type it)
http://geeks.thedailywh.at/2011/11/16/tardis-refriferator-of-the-day
Alastair had better get to work…
Ages ago, just after we’d started living together, someone who had been married for decades took me on one side and said she was going to give me the most important tip for a happy married life, the one thing she’d learned the hard way that she’d like to pass on. I was slightly nervous about this because I didn’t know her THAT well and I was worried where it might be going. So to speak. Anyway what she said (“and I know this sounds harsh”) was to refuse all invitations to family Christmas dinners, stay home and lock the doors. Every time I am sitting gritting my teeth trying to be civil over the turkey I am reminded of this little tete-a-tete and just how very right she was. You have a good six years where you can stay home and say it’s for the sake of the children, so enjoy it.
Mince-pie-ice-cream (delic!) AND cheese & biscuits! Always AND, never OR!
It sounds absolutely perfect!!
Christmas away from my family has always been a little bit difficult but last year after some family stuff happened, I just threw in the towel and said I would do it my way. Now we spend Christmas Eve with friends, the day itself we do the way my inlaws like it, its fine, not my way but still FINE. And then Christmas night we go round to friends, his family live far away too so we drown our sorrows, play cards, talk crap and pass out way too late. Perfect…. just perfect.
I am looking forward to Christmas this year, too. My girls are finally (2 1/2 and almost 4) old enough to look forward to Santa. I’ve always adored Christmas, obviously..but there’s something abour participating in that dream and helping it become a reality, it’s indescribale. That sparkle and the joy I see in their faces…worth every long line, every door not held when my arms are full of packages.
As always, I can’t wait to see what Santa has to say this year! He’s so wise. :)
Ahhh, word spelled incorrectly! OCD, I can’t let it go!
It sounds marvelous and not too fussy. I’m interested in the goose—I’ve never had it either, and I know it’s not cooked quite the same as a turkey. (Thank goodness for Food Network! Seriously, is there anything they don’t give instructions for?)
It was a Christmas post that first brought me to your blog, and the quality of writing that has kept me coming back. I hope that you will bind them all together someday, even if it’s only for Nick & Nora.
If Santa arrives to find the mince pies gone, apologize to him for me. And then call the fire department, as I’ll probably be lodged in your chimney with crumbs all over me. Or just send up some extra hard sauce. Either will do.
We will be spending Christmas Day with no company this year as well. And it will be perfect. No company to wait on, try to make happy, or cook for. We can cook what we want, eat when we want, and open gifts as we want. No horroble comments and judgemental looks. Just my husband, and my two kids. I am so happy this holiday will be like that too. My daughter will be graduating in June…who knows what will happen next year.
Sounds positively delightful, from trains and dollhouses, to lights and goose.
Its hard-our family loves the holidays, but the last two years have felt so wrong without all of us together. This year, there’s a feeling of emptiness and sadness in all of our hearts. For the first time, I am actually half-dreading the holidays, and I hate that.
Planning Christmas so much in detail has always been a guarantee for a failure in my family. Expectation forces disappointment. OK preparation is useful, especially if you have children hoping for presents. But everything else is a matter of flow, like every other weekend. We even had our tropic palm plant lighted once because there weren’t any trees left on the market. It was a very cosy Christmas, though..
It sounds like the perfect Christmas you’re planning :)