Right so…
Hey, how about them joints?
Have been doing a lot of research and tomorrow am booking an appointment to do some testing to see if I have That Other Kind of EDS, because I do have some symptoms of that as well. The really bad kind. What I have is just bad, there is a really bad out there too.
But in the meantime, I’m off to London today for a full-day meeting in what I think and hope will be my last business jaunt to London for Dream Job. The world is spinning, life is moving, and my last final interview is on Friday, so by this time next week hopefully there are more options. Even if not, there is at least one option – I have an offer. I’m outta’ here.
So since my head’s a bit screwed up and I’m off to London still a bit dozy from bad dreams and my babies are chatting and giggling upstairs and oh my God does train travel stress me out and do you have any idea how underprepared I am for this meeting today? I’m taking an easy way out.
You know so much about me.
Tell me something about you.
If you want, that is.
It’d just be nice to know something about you, there on the other side of the screen.
-H.
Go on – just watch this for the NSPCC!
Make me feel loved! Go on! Sign the Guest Map!
Hi, I’m Solomon, and I used to be an “Approval Addict”. (from the audience) “Hi Solomon.”
About 10 years ago, I got more confident (not over confident, mind you) and just stopped needing other people’s approval. I still LIKE approval from people I consider important (wife, children, certain friends, parents,…) but don’t really need it.
I’m 42 and 2 weeks ago had my first real “old man” incident. While lifting a soccer (or football) goal, I hurt my lower back. The spine, not the muscles. It still hurts, so I’ll probably go to the doctor next week. Feel free to e-mail me at MGrubb@vwstores.com if you know anything about caring for “herniated” or “ruptured” disks…especially if it doesn’t involve a doctor. :)
I love most sports, am a computer programmer, and am very much a creature of habit.
I really like hanging out here, and hearing y’all’s views. While Helen and I are polar opposites in some things, I think we’re similar in some others…that may make her cringe. :)
In all seriousness, I’m EXTREMELY sorry to hear about your diagnosis Helen and am praying you don’t have the REALLY bad kind.
1) I just graduated with a bachelor’s in writing this May, and I’m planning to start my master’s in the same area of study. This is probably good because everyone in my family has a doctorate, and because writing is the only thing I’m cut out for that pays.
2) You gave me some excellent travel tips for London in January.
3) I’m 24.
4) I’ve never wanted kids, or even liked most of them, but I think yours are just stinking adorable.
5) I can’t drive because of debilitating migraines.
6) I’ve been with the boyfriend almost 5 years, and there will be a marriage after academics are completed.
7) I keep a blog, but it’s private. If you had a username on the journal where I keep it, you’d be on the shortlist.
8) I’m currently estranged from both of my parents.
9) I’m sad because I shopped at Evans while I was in London and we don’t have it here and I miss it.
10) Your blog is my favorite, and reading it makes me want to either hang out with you or be your pen pal… no joke.
1. My name is Jen. I’m 31, single, go to law school in Boston.
2. I’ve been a long, long time lurker. I have been reading you back when you used to work in Sweden. Your experiences helped me be ok with going to a crazy hospital over a year ago when I was suicidal. I thank you for that.
3. My mom is from Guatemala and my dad is from Iraq. I’m happy to be so diverse. My brother seems to want to forget being so diverse. It makes me sad.
4. That being said, neither community fully accepts me. I used to be really mad about it. Now I figure it’s their loss.
5. Reading your blog nowadays makes my ovaries ache. In a good way. Even though babies are further down the road for me.
6. My dad is currently in a dangerous part of the world translating for the US army. Homeland security listens to my conversations with him. Every time I talk to him, I make sure to take a moment to tell Homeland security what an idiot our current president is. I also call them a bunc of assholes. This annoys my dad who has bought into the conservative crap the army feeds him.
7. I don’t know what I would do if you didn’t blog anymore.
- I am a wife and mother of two boys who are 6 and 12 years old.
- I am a sys admin for a defense agency.
- I led my family to TX 4 years ago so my boys could be near their grandparents and their great grandmother.
- I have found There are huge challenges with living near my parents.
- My husband and I left our hearts in Colorado, as time passes, I fear the damage I could cause my children when we get the motivation to move back.
- I am home today caring for my husband who just had surgery on his nose
- My manager is an arrogant ass who would never let me work from home even tho my job is totally portable – he just likes to micromanage and is suffocating our team.
- The sun is shining and my dog Zoie and kitty Sylvester are sleeping on each side of my lap.
Hope you find a nice way to unwind after a complicated day of travel.
Another Jennifer in a sea of Jennifers born in the 1970
I’m nearly 29. I live in Orlando, Florida.
I have read you faithfully for years.
I have blogged for five years. It does not match the likeness of yours.
I have two dogs, three cats, and I want children.
I am getting married to Hubby #2 next October.
My first husband was an ass and your kind emails got me through. Thank you.
We have a mutual friend – CTG.
I think you are absolutely riveting.
I am 51, act like I’m 21, (it still amazes me that I can buy booze), married for 17 years to a really good guy, (although there have been times that I wasthisclose to leaving him, but now we are older we have settled down to no drama), have two years to retire, have been going to school for another career that I can work part time to buy gas for my motorhome so I can travel, have 3 big doofy dogs, aging parents, two kids by a previous marriage, 5 grandkids, and some days all I want to be is a missing person.
And I worry about you. And agree with what Ms. Pants said.
You already know a fair bit about me, but I’ll share a bit more:
I once worked on a project for the space shuttle, thereby making the international space station a possibility which, unfortunately, it isn’t as yet. And no, the part I worked did not in any way fail.
I was programmer/data analyst for almost 10 years. During that time, I met the woman who became-and remains- my wife and the love of my life.
I’m currently employed as a nuclear engineer.
I’m an ordained minister and have presided over 3 weddings. While I had thought that I was retired, there is a strong possibility that my brother-in-law will ask me to officiate at his wedding near the end of this year.
I was a su chef for 13+ years. It was a pretty good gig and it got me through grad school. More importantly, I’m a pretty fair cook. Just ask my wife.
I have 2-1/2 children; #3 is on the way. They have brought joy into my life that I never thought possible.
Hmmm. What else can I bore you with? I’ve run 6 half-marathons in the past and plan to run another this year after a 10 year layoff. So, you know, training sucks and all.
One final thing: I consider myself fortunate for having stumbled onto this blog, and you along with it. And I’m always rooting for you.
Take care, Helen.
Hi,
I have lurked here for years now, I think about 3… This is the only blog that I read and I have never commented before.
I’m 28 and a teacher in the UK. This term has been busy, I started a long distance relationship with someone that I’ve known for 14 years in the summer and finished my MA this month.
I really love your blog, it is very funny, moving and inspirational. I hope that you don’t have the really bad version of EDS!
* I’ve been reading your blog forever, it seems, and I have come to consider you a friend; I check in with you first thing every morning with my coffee. I don’t know what I’d do if you suddenly decided to quit sharing your life online.
* I had a “starter marriage” that didn’t work out because my husband turned out to be an amazing asshole, which he’d managed to cover up long enough for us to get married. That said, he taught me things about myself I never would have known without him. He also introduced me to my current husband, for which I am eternally grateful because I think we’re soul-mates (even if we have moments of not seeing eye to eye).
* I work at home, for a company that provides moderation services and takes itself so seriously that I had to sign a confidentiality agreement. I love my job and the fact that it allows me to be here with my kids when they get home from school, although working at home isn’t always all it’s cracked up to be. I love that my “work clothes” are my most comfortable pair of pajamas.
* I drive a 24 year old car and love it so much I find places to drive just so I can commune with it. It’s also big enough that if my husband and I want to go away for a weekend we could either cram it full of camping gear or we could take just a mattress and a sleeping bag, lower the back seat and sleep in the car.
* If I had known that a motorcycle would make my husband (and therefore me) so happy I would have found a way to get him one 15 years ago. Seriously.
* I was not trying to get pregnant when I had my first child and he turned out to be a dream child. I had to talk my husband into our second child and he is hyper-intelligent and very challenging to parent. Someday he will either be a rocket scientist or a mad scientist. I have to remind him sometimes to use his powers for Good.
* I tried to be a good step-parent but I think it was too late to make any real difference after my step-son had already been exposed to so much trauma and confusion in his early life. I’m trying to live with feeling like a failure after not being able to “save” him.
* I have a bit of a savior complex and want to be able to fix everything.
* I live in what I consider the most beautiful part of the world and the thought of someday moving back to where my husband grew up terrifies me to no end. If I could have everything I want I would have homes in both places and be able to travel back and forth whenever we wished.
* I didn’t have the best relationship with my mother, who died in May 2007. I am estranged from my father and he’s only ever met one of my children – my son was 9 months old at the time. I’m ok with it, mostly, but sometimes I wonder if my kids should have had the opportunity to get to know him. Then I put it out of my mind for another few months/years.
* I think in bullets and lists.
* I used to do musical theater in high school and the years right after – everything from Snoopy!!! to Jesus Christ Superstar to Fiddler on the Roof – and I still sing some of the songs to myself.
* I participated in spelling bees when I was in elementary school and nearly won the state contest once. One of my biggest pet peeves is poor spelling to this day.
* When I started this list I had no idea what I might write that you hadn’t already heard at one point or another, but I think I came up with a couple items. ;)
Best of luck with the meeting, the job interviews, and with the doctors.
PS: My husband told me I need to quit reading about EDS because it’s freaking me out a little bit, but I can’t make myself stop. I have a slight heart murmur, hyperflexible joints and a tendency to bruise easily, none of which have ever been explained. My mother died of complications from Rheumatoid Arthritis, a heart irregularity, and an aortal aneurysm – I guess I should probably start being pro-active and get myself to a doctor as soon as I have insurance again but I have put it off because I’m scared. You are helping me to conquer the fear and just *do* something. I still don’t really want to because I’m not in constant pain and the anxiety over it all is currently manageable. If I don’t know about it, it can’t hurt me. Maybe. I have never said that out loud to anyone but my husband before and now I’ve gone and told the entire internet. See the effect you have on people?
If you really want to know… I’m a 34 year old former PR executive turned homemaker and mother of 15 month old boy/girl twins. Although I love being home with my kids, I detest the term “stay at home mom” – sounds like a type of incarceration. I studied journalism in college and still dream of writing my own column one day. Would likely help said dream if I did a public blog, but husband is afraid of putting our lives “out there” and I must agree or I’d be doing it.
Found a kindred spirit in you Helen, as we share our infertility struggles and subsequent miracle twins, the ability to deal with both drama and elation by writing it out, a tendency toward perfectionism, a passion for all things food and wine and a love of 80′s music and Eva Cassidy. I’m known to be a very happy, optimistic person, but inside I’m always a bit melancholy – and I like it that way.
Something about me: I love fonts. Covet them, love them, stare at them.
I am a teacher and mom to five children. My youngest is one month younger than Nick and Nora and the oldest is 12. I live in TN but am still a MS gal at heart. I’ve been reading your blog since you found out you were expecting twins. Your blog is my favorite!
Hi Helen – I’ve been reading your blog for awhile now. I’m not even sure how I found it. Probably through some infertility link or something. I started reading a little bit before your twins were born.
I am a 37 year old stay at home mom living on Long Island, New York. Although I am originally from California. I finally have a beautiful 3 month old son after trying to conceive for more than 10 years. He was conceived through IUI. I developed pre-eclampsia and he was delivered at 33 weeks.
I enjoy reading your blog because it gives me an escape from some of the sad and stressful moments in my life. I’ve enjoyed reading the stories about your life, family and seeing the images of your sweet babies. Thanks for giving me a break when I need it.
I am a German graduate student living in a dorm in Illinois; I have a boyfriend much too far away in Massachusetts. This pretty much means my family life is nonexistent, and I like to borrow those of other people, including yours. Only for the two minutes it takes me to read a post, though.
Oh, and I have tinnitus, which means my ears ring constantly and it does terrible things to your ability to concentration. It drives me nuts and there is no cure, so I can sympathize with your medical situation.
Good luck with everything!
Kind of new to this blog, found you through… I don’t know, probably another blog, possibly from a flickr friend… random clicking…
Me
1) 24, turning 25 at the end of the year
2) Single (… )
3) Work at a university, doing web stuff
4) Taking Masters classes for a degree in Instructional Technology. Online.
5) Spend far too much time on my computer. Seriously. Far too much.
6) Life goals – to get married, to have children, to buy a house, to become a better photographer
7) Scared of horses
I’m fascinated by everyone that has posted here – wow, so many different types of people who read this blog, such a fascinating cross-section of people out there.
Love your blog, your honesty, and looking forward to reading more.
I think you know about me already, but I was here today.
I’m a 29 year old computer nerd who lives in Oak Forest, IL. It’s a small suburb of Chicago. I’m turning 30 in February and I’m starting to have a mini-life crisis about it.
Funny isn’t it?! We are all meant to be here to learn about you but the minute you ask ‘us’ about oursevles we all talk!
Well, i have been reading since the Swedish dark days, i hope to continue to cheer from the cheap seats for a long time to come. I don’t ‘know’ you but i have come to care about you and your lovely family.
I live and work close to the area you moved to with Angus (don’t worry, not stalker close!)
I work with the turely disadvantaged in society in a difficult but rewarding job that make some choose to talk to others at social gatherings! I also work with prisoners on death row in my spare time – i know, total conversation killer!
I have a childish love of fairies hence the email.
I am 30, married to a wonderful boy i meet in my teens.
I am somewhere left of ghandi, i am left handed, dyslexic, i have two degrees and an MSC, i try to be a good friend and value my family and friends above all else.
I like to take pictures, drink tea, laugh, eat good food, travel, look at the stars, ‘make things’, read, watch re-runs of miss marple, love Joan Hickson and write and receive letters.
I think that is more than you could possibly want to know. I hope your readership does not scare you!
Abs x
I’ve been reading you for a long time–since long before you had your beautiful babies.
I think one of the first things I read of yours was about Kim and that loss. Both kinds–the break up of your relationship and his actual bodily death.
I know this sounds morbid, but I read it over and over. I hoped it would help me to know that people adjust to these sorts of things. I use “adjust” purposely. . . because there are certain things people don’t ever get over.
Not that my beloved died. We spent 16 years together (college, medical school, residency, etc.) He helped me raise my(smart and beautiful) now-24 year-old from the time she was 18 months old.
We were crazy about each other. We were, unfortunately, also crazy with each other. So in 2000, we broke up. Forever. But not until after I had undergone an abortion at the tail end of the relationship at his behest. “Vast suckage” does not begin to describe how I felt about this… how I feel about this even now.
He was mostly selfish and spoiled, but I was no angel, either, and probably. . . no, I couldn’t have fixed it. We really were not meant to be. We have not talked since the split which was ugly and horrible and one for the history books. Scary confession: sometimes, I still miss him. Scary confession two: sometimes, I dream about him and when I wake up, for just a brief moment, I think we are still together. Sometimes, upon true consciousness, I am relieved, but always, maybe a little bit sad?
At 40, I married a man 20 years my senior. I am wife #4. The first two times he was married were for seven and 15 years, respectively. The third time only for five, because that wife died of an absolutely horrendous form of brain cancer. He has two grown children who positively adore me (I am LUCKY!), and I am now a grandmother to 6! He is nothing like the ex, and I love, love, love him. I also know that it is highly likely that he will die before me, and no matter how long we get together, it will not be enough. I don’t like that. At. All. We, do not however, have the same kinds of conversation that I was once accustomed to (he’s kind of a loner-cowboy type), and sometimes I am very lonely. But who isn’t?
I have an MA in English, with a concentration in creative writing. I was a poet for a long time. Now I work for a large accounting firm in their marketing dept. It pays well, and I love the people I work with, although this corporate life always feels like a struggle for a person of my less-tnan-conservative appearance and opinions. I rarely write poetry anymore. But at least, I will be able to pay off the almost-six-figure financial debt my fancy degree cost me. However, I wouldn’t have traded that experience for the world. But I’d trade the debt in a heartbeat.
I would say that I am mostly happy with a propensity for great anxiety and regret. They are not mutually exclusive. As you know.
I love, honor, and cherish my girlfriends with the deepest and most constant loyalty and devotion. I do not know what I’d do without any of them. I am lucky to have a nice-sized circle of “best friends,” and now that my daughter is 24, she shares them with me!
Writing this was amazingly cathartic and the best way of ignoring my inbox. It, apparently, can wait until tomorrow.
I first found you through one of your explored pictures on Flickr and followed your pictures for some time now. Several months back, I linked to your blog from your profile page and have been reading it ever since. I don’t read blogs. Never had any interest in them, but I really like to read what you write and check your blog each day for more.
I am a 31 year old male embedded software engineer living in Oregon. I like to think I’m really more like 16 though. I’ve been married for nearly 10 years now to a wonderful young woman, my high school sweetheart. We don’t have any children, or any interest in having any of our own, but do enjoy watching other children interact and grow.
I’m so glad you are willing to share this window into your life. So often your words really make me smile. Thank you Helen Adalaide.
Christopher
1. I don’t remember how I found your blog but I’ve checked it almost daily since I found it.
2. I found it just after you announced you were pregnant. I was in the midst of miscarriage and infertility.
3. I now have a 7 week old son. He is beautiful.
4. I also have struggled with depression and bulimia.
5. My husband wants to move to England so I’m always checking in on how you like it. (I currently live in the states)
6.I went to college for an art degree only to go right back to become a nurse. Now I’m a pediatric nurse.
7. I’m afraid I have Ehler-Danlos Syndrome as well, I have the joint flexibility and since pregnancy have a horrible pain in my a joint in my pelvis. I hope you don’t have the horrible kind.
8.I used to write poetry, now I write it in my head when I drive but can’t put it on paper. I’m not sure what that’s about.
9.My husband is a musician and that’s how I fell in love with him.
10. I love to read your blog and wish only good things for you. Love seeing the progress on the house and watching your kiddos grow!
and 11 (because it’s “one louder” (ignore that if you haven’t seen Spinal Tap))
11. I have my fingers crossed for you to get dream job. Hope for me I get one too.. I’m looking to change before my maternity leave is up in a few weeks. I really need a new job.
Meredith
I comment here sometimes and yours is one of the first sites I go to in the morning. You and I have started many days together.
What can I tell you about me? I honestly think I’m pretty boring, but, here we go:
1. I’m an avid knitter and just learned how to spin (make) my own yarn. The spinning isn’t going as hot as you might think. I’m all thumbs at it.
2. I finished radiation treatments for Stage I Breast Cancer last month and had a lumpectomy in August.
3. I have a fear of being alone for the rest of my life.
4. I love to read–if I’m not knitting, I’m reading. Sometimes, I read about knitting (yes, I know. Told you I was boring!)
5. I’m estranged from my family and have been for 10 years. I’ve only recently begun to get back into contact with an uncle and that’s still very new to me.
6. I love to travel even though a) I can’t afford it and b) I’m slightly agorophobic.
7. I’m a wanna be ghost hunter.
8. I’m 35, working as a customer service rep for a major health insurance company.
9. I’m near sighted in one eye and far sighted in the other.
10. I’d love to move from Pittsburgh but probably never will
What to say when one finally crosses over from being a lurker? Actually commenting feels so strange I cannot even begin to tell you.
I
I’m about to do another IVF cycle. How’s that for crazy … but it’s not for me. I’m going to be a carrier for my sister and her husband. Nutty right? I got 18 month old twins, and I might be pregnant again very soon!
Random facts about me:
*I don’t mix my foods. I will eat all of one thing on my plate before I move on to the next thing.
*I get hives every month before I start my af. (lets everyone know when I am about to start!) I’ve been this way since May 2005. The hives stopped while I was pregnant.
*I can pick things up and pinch with my toes.
*I hate spiders. Seriously. Ugg.
*People think I am confident, but I am really not.
*I don’t cook unless I absolutely have to–I do bake, though.
*My favorite color is black, but that isn’t really a color, so I tell people I like green.
*I would let my husband scratch my back for-ev-er if he would. Why won’t he? :-)
*I can’t spell worth a bean anymore because my students have ruined me. I see words misspelled all day long, and now I can’t tell you what is right and wrong anymore. Sigh.
*My dream jobs (if I wasn’t doing what I am doing) would be a pilot or a meteorologist.
How was that?
Brave girl to ask about all of us… Must be out of reading material… LOL!
Hum… so what can I say about myself that you can’t find out from my Facebook account…
* Almost 40 and not dealing well at all with it.
* Met hubby on a blind date.
* 1 daughter + 1 son – lots of fertility drugs
* My daughter looks just like me. My son looks like my husband. My son has spina bifida and uses a wheelchair to get around.
* 2 miscarriages
* I live in Tennessee.
* Fortunately I love to travel. Last year I spent 32 days away from home on various trips to London (twice), Paris, Brighton (UK), Delhi (India), and Salt Lake City…ALL involving work in some capacity.
* I’m currently a project manager; however, I was an accountant for well over a decade.
* I work for a global company whose European operations are located in Brighton.
* I’ve quite competitive by nature as well as outgoing; however, I really don’t like parties where I only know a few people. I can’t find anything to talk about with strangers at parties. BUT I can chat all day long w/ random people in line at Walmart/Target/etc.
* I’m very short (5′ tall).
I started reading your blog a few years ago but for the life of me cannot recall how I found you.
I love your blog, and photos! I have been reading for years! I also have IVF twins, and they recently turned one, so now I can breath a little bit, and catch up with you.
I am an ICU RN, but home caring for my babies now, not working at the hospital. I love to be outdoors and running and moving around and exploring and art and museums and politics and books. I love food and cooking and my astoundingly smart and good smelling husband of four years. And my friends. I love a lot of things, am not a very complex person I guess, kind of golden retriever-ish, hopefully a bit more clever.
Fingers are always crossed for you and yours!
Hugs from the mountains,
Froofroo
Some facts about me:
-Have been reading since just after you moved to the the UK
-Female, late thirties living in upstate NY
-Grew up in the Netherlands and lived in the UK but neither Dutch nor English
-Worked close to where you currently live
-No kids, no partner and sometimes i worry I am far too content this way
-Intense rewarding job but I worry I am hooked on the adrenaline -it can’t be healthy but it is fun
-Have had to accept that I am competitive, driven and probably a “type A” even though that is not part of my self image (gave my bother a good laugh when I told him about this discovery)
-Hooked on yoga, and still amazed that the “hocus pokus” side appeals to me
-Sometimes I miss California something fierce
Hi Helen! Thought I’d join the party… it’s like Post Secret on here! Let’s see, about me…
1. Camino is not my real name. It’s the name of my landlady when I lived in Spain 15 or so years ago. I just like it, snd I don’t think she’d mind that I “borrow” it.
2. I’ve been reading your blog forever. The quality of your writing is consistently excellent (and your photography, too), and there’s not many things you can say that about these days.
3. I’m a French & Spanish high school teacher. I love it, but the kids drive me crazy because I care more about their learning than they do, and I really don’t have time for that!
4. I have an adopted son… he’s going to be 2 in November! I married a man who I knew could not have children and I’ve made my peace with it. My little guy is the joy of my life and if I’d had my “own” child, who knows where he’d be right now?
5. I admire you, and hope you keep writing forever :-)
Camino
I know I’m late, but I’ll comment anyway.
- I am half Italian and half German, but I don’t really feel Italian nor German. I guess the UK is my country of adoption…
- My name comes from a short story by Stendhal, my mum’s favourite writer, called ‘Vanina Vanini’. My brother also has a literary name.
- In July of this year a report I wrote for Oxfam (whilst doing research for my master’s thesis) was presented in Parliament. Even though my name was never mentioned during the presentation, I still feel proud (because of the report the British government decided not to scrap a visa programme for domestic workers). Writing that report and my thesis was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.
- I spent nine months working in Indonesia and it changed my life. Don’t know why I didn’t realise then (before doing my master’s in Development Studies) that development work is not for me!
- What I really should have gone into is interior design. Frivolous, maybe, but I love it. I’ve just moved into an unfurnished flat and planning how to decorate is the most fun I’ve had in a while. Which is why I really enjoyed seeing your ‘new’ house taking shape!
- I think you’re an amazing writer, and I can’t wait to read your book, which I’m 100% will be published. I wish I was as good a writer as that… In English. Which is weirdly enough my favourite language of communication (Italian is my mother tongue).
Go Helen!
x
Hi Helen,
I missed this yesterday but I liked the concept and thought I’d do it anyway..:*)
My name is Natalie and I’m a french Canadian living on the East Coast of Canada. I have a 7 1/2 month old son that feeds my soul. I’m about 2 weeks away from returning to work as a corporate litigation lawyer with the Provincial government..a thought that both thrills and terrifies me…how is that possible?
I met my husband in law school. He’s funny, quirky, frustrating, kind, generous and childish (in both good and bad ways). We LOVE to drink wine and eat good food and have a passion for travel…we’ve been to some weird places together including Mongolia. We have a Beagle named Genghis. He’s always hungry.
I’ve had the best and worst past 7 months…while the Big Lebowski’s arrival rocked my world and lifted my soul…my Mom was also diagnosed with breast and lunch cancer…in two words…it sucks.
I’ve been reading your blog for quite awhile now…can’t remember how I can accross you….all I know is that much like my morning coffee, you are part of my day…from accross the ocean..:*)
I hope you had a good day in London, sorry to hear about your diagnosis (I’m pretty sure you didn’t need any more complicated news at this point, the universe is fucked like that!).
Take care….thanks! It was nice to formally introduce myself.
- Happily married (at least most of the time)
- Mother of two (9 year old girl, 7 year old boy)
- 2 dogs (chinese pugs – they are sisters)
- 2 hamsters
- live in Ontario, Canada
- born in Newfoundland, Canada
- Work full time (Admin. Assistant)
- Kids hockey schedule runs my life
Not sure how I came upon your blog but I read every morning while having my tea.
Your babies are gorgeous as are you and I’m rooting for you and that man of yours – I think it’s meant to be :)
Hi! Just a wife and mom here in WI. I provide elder care for a living (part time) and have been reading you for a very very long time.
I am rooting for you Helen, and will continue to. Have a great day.
A day late and a dollar short as usual. It actually took a little while to get the courage to post a comment…
I have been reading for awhile, but can’t quite remember how I came upon you.
OK- Pertinent info:
* I am 33
* Mom of a 7 year old daughter who is the love of my life and the greatest test of my patience all at the same time.
* I live in sunny San Diego,California.
* I am Human Resources for an electronics manufacturer.
* Am a bit of a smartass.
* While I think I am funny, my husband does not.
* Your writing is astounding.
* Your blog is the first one I read every day.
* I cried when you had the babies. :)
I think that is all the important stuff.
Hi! Okay, so I’m delurking after about 5 years of reading your posts. ;~) I have so appreciated the feeling that I’m not so alone in the craziness and defeats of life. So… some facts about me.
*I’m in my early 30s
* Not married, but dating a wonderful guy. We’re talking marriage, but want to give it a little more time. We’re both rather cautious about how life likes to change the script.
*I live in the midwest, not too far from where you used to visit during the summers.
*I am currently a business student in accounting. I decided one degree wasn’t enough, so chucked my full-time job and have gone back to school. Talk about scary and challenging. Connecting with the other students has had its challenges…. I hate to sound cliche, but they’re just so YOUNG.
*My hobby is bellydancing. I’ve a mixed heritage, so have been enjoying this dance style since I was an early teen. It’s wonderfully exhilarating, but also heartbreaking at time. I’m not the smallest woman, so facing the popular stereotypes of what women should look like has had its challenges and tears.
I think that answers the basic questions about me. Please know that there are so many of us out here fighting/celebrating with you and crying when life gives you a kick.
Hug,
T
I live on the west coast of Canada. I work at a job that I thought was going to be my dream job, but it feels more like a nightmare. I’m plotting an escape.
Last summer my husband and I bought a house that needs alot of love. We spent the winter digging new perimeter drains by hand. And putting in a basement suite to stave off the mortgage monster. Now, as time and money permit, we are working on making our space more liveable. Your renovations inspire me. Tell me, does Steve have a North American cousin?
Let’s see…I work at the same movie theatre I started at 4 years ago. The pay is ass, but I like the job…mostly.
Something that detracts from that mostly is that the Ex works for the company. And yesterday, he sent a friend of his with some bizarre greeting for my boss which perplexed her, that I think was directed at me. Cause on the anniversary of our break-up, it’s otherwise an amazing coincidence.
I have two nephews, one 8 years old, the other just turned 10 months. Both of them fart sunshine and poop rainbows.
Something about me.
I was surprised to find out that I am an ENFJ after years of thinking I was an INTJ. It was probably one of the most freeing discoveries I’ve had.
I moved from the UK to the US three years ago and am living the life I wish I’d had 10 years ago.
I want to be married and have a family, but relationships scare the crap outta me.
I believe that I am destined for greatness, but not in a showy way, I’m gonna be someone’s secret superhero.
You once told me your real name after I sent in a link for British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy. It’s one of my favourite secrets.
I am a year or two younger than you, have a husband and a five-month-old who is teething, and live in central California. Though not in Stockton, Manteca, or any of those low-job areas.
So much for the vital statistics.
I am an insane reader with a yearly average of 150-200 books, not counting children’s literature. I often get in over my head because I work best when overcommitted, though that’s suffering a bit since Gareth takes an insane amount of time for some who can’t even sit up yet. I’m a shutterbug of the first order, a Photoshop expert, an artist, musician, singer, graphic designer, and set painter. I participate in a yearly Gilbert & Sullivan production. (This spring I was not on stage; they said I could be and I said an “unmarried peasant girl” who was nine months pregnant would be an interesting take on the subject.)
Family is very important to me and I’m lucky enough to be in one that’s sane. For those of you with screwed-up families, remember that family is not necessarily the one you’re born with.
I try to put positive things in the world. “If you can’t say something nice,” indeed. I’ve found it helps me to be happier.
And bubby is teething right now and extremely fussy. So I’m typing one-handed.
Hmm – me 40ish, lawyer, Londoner. 2 kids – 3 ivfs, 1 fet, 1 natural pg, 2 miscarriages. Been with husband since I was 19. generally a pretty grumpy cow. Shout at my kids too much but love them more than anything else. Bad blogger but relatively good commenter.
I just turned 46 and found your blog after I suffered my 1st m/c quite a few years ago. Been hooked ever since.
I’m a native NYer living in South Florida for 19+ years with my husband. I have three dogs (my babies) and two tortoises. My husband has a yucky snake and a huge black throated monitor lizard.
You blog is such an inspiration to me and it is so well written. When your novel comes out I’ll probably be the first to buy it. I love to read. I also find it so very interesting that you are American, but live across the “pond.” I don’t think I’ve ever come across how you ended up where you are now, but I’m sure it’s a great adventure. My maternal grandmother was born in Tottenham England and my maternal great-grandmother was supposed to come to meet my great-grandfather in America via the Titanic when my grandmother was only 4 years old! At the last moment she had a premonition and would not set foot on the ship. For months & months my great-grandfather believed his wife and children perished in the icy waters as inter-continental communications were so slow.
I am quite concerned about your diagnosis and hope with all my heart that something can be done to ease your pain and halt the progress of symptoms. Although we have never met or spoken, I do find myself caring what happens to you.
Warmest regards and best wishes!
I’ve told you a lot about myself over the years and the comments, but you’ve never actually asked like this, so here goes:
I’m a 51-yr-old woman from the midwest who has been married for almost 30 years to a second husband. I have four grown kids, one grandson, five cats, three dogs. I am mostly happy now. I am an only child and had undiagnosed alchoholic middle-class parents who emotionally and sometimese physically abused me and drove my self-esteem into the gutter. I have been on the depression train more times than I care to think and have tried to kill myself more than once. I was raped. I found your blog several years ago and was so touched by your words that I couldn’t pull away. I wish I could write the way you can write.
I’ll be coming back here again and again for as long as you are here to find joy in your ups and to offer solice in your downs. I hope life finds you with more ups than downs.
Well, better late than never, so I figured I’d jump in here as well…
I’m a Texas girl, born and raised about an hour outside of DFW, and now live in the Houston area.
Right after my husband and I got married, we moved to Malaysia for work. We were there a little under two years, and we moved back to Texas when I was six months pregnant with our daughter.
I thought I would love Malaysia and have no problem adjusting to life in SE Asia. Well, I did have problems adjusting, and although there were times that I enjoyed living there, I do regret that I didn’t enjoy our time there more than I did. I have to say though, I’m so glad to be back home in the land of 24 Walgreens and real Mexican food.
I have a five month old daughter who is an absolute joy. She just discovered her feet and is now an avid toe sucker. I have been staying at home with her, but I’m secretly afraid that my brain is turning to mush.
I work in HR, which was intentional. Specifically, HR systems, which was not.
I return to work part time in two weeks. Luckily, I will be able to telecommute. Hopefully, it will be the best of both worlds, but I still worry about the nanny running away with my baby. How nuts is that?
I always hate every haircut I ever get. Always.
I can’t keep any plant alive. Not even ivy.
I think you’re an amazing writer and I read your blog every day (found you through Spuddy Buddy). Thanks for sharing a bit of your life with us.
I’m Cissy. I live in North Carolina, right on the ocean. I’m not sure how I stumbled on your blog, but it was just about the time you became pregnant. I have enjoyed peeking at your life and your beautiful family. I’m a student. (Clinical Lab Science, Forensics and such) and love you get away from my textbooks as often as possible. I love the way you write and find myself looking for updates often. Your babies are adorable and growing so quickly. Thanks for letting us in.
Aday late nd a dollar short seems to be the story of my life. Not complaining as I have had a good life. From what I read here I’m the oldest responder. 65 and counting.
I got here thru Skippy of Fareastcynic.com fame. Since I fould you have been a regular reader and occassional contributor. Over the years I have read and often re-read all you posts. Your skill and ability to capture and communicate feelings, emotions and events has incresed from super to muy excellant super grande.
I am a physician, husband to a great women I really do not deserve. Father to two great daughters age 34 and 30 and step dad to a great son 27 yo. I also have a daugher ho died at 3 weeks of age 37 years ago. I still grieve for her.
You and Angus have the Swunt. We have the SCunt. From all you have written they could be sisters. She has interferred and made life miserable for all concerned since 1980 when we split.
My most recent ex-wife is/was a good person. We were unable to overcome the problems a dual physician in same practice created. If anyone needs a great super subspecialist radiologist who specializes in woman’s imaging especially mammography) is central Florida (Orlando)one could not do better. I can refer if someone wants.
I live in SC am a graduate of one of the most conservative colleges in the world. A good friend has told me I am one of the three liberal graduates. He and my deceased roommate being the other two.
For the good of the USA and the world I hope Obama is elected.
Thanx for the opportunity to comment.
Hi Again Helen,
We’ve emailed a time or two. Nothing in depth. If you remember I offered to do some shopping in Target for you a year or so ago during Christmas season. But I read your posts almost daily. You’re one of my favorite bloggers, as you are always so “real” (for lack of a better adjective).
Some random tidbits about me:
I was a virgin until I was 32. At which time I met my husband, and gave it all up on our second date. In just a few short years so much has changed for me. My sole dream in life was to become a Mom. Two years ago, I was diagnosed with uterine cancer and had a complete hysterectomy. Now, having just turned 40 last month, I am in forced menapause and loosing my mind! Sex is now a project, I will never give birth to the child I wanted so desperately. While on disability, I was let go from a job I held for 16 years. I have not gotten back into the swing of the working world again. I totally admire your professional drive, as I have never wanted to have a full blown career. To have ambition for something of that nature would at least give me something new to strive for these days. Since all this medical nonsense started, I’ve been battling with depression but am too scared to start therapy. I know I probably should but the thought freightens the dickens out of me. Honestly, while the cancer was a blow to me, the thought of not having a child of my own is the major cause of the depression. I would love to adopt but have no bank account to fund it all. On the bright side, I have a wonderfull husband and a terrific family. Without their love and constant support I think I would’ve crumpled up long ago.
I have absolutely no recollection of where I found you, but I’m continually glad I did!
Hello! I am a bit of a lurker – I read you religiously, but have only commented a couple times in the past few years. And it does seem only fair that you should know who we are too!
I live in a famously liberal town in a liberal state. I love it. I teach middle school Language Arts and SS. I love that too.
My first child will be 1 month on Friday – which is hard to believe – the days just blur by. He is beautiful, even when pooing and crying.
I am a total nerd, and proud of it. I suck at all sports and card games, but I kick butt at Jeopardy.
I tend to be sarcastic, and a total know-it-all. I am also a total softie, and am too empathetic towards others for my own good at times.
I will watch ANY movie, no matter how bad, multiple times, so long as it features dancing… or Ewan McGreggor. Luckily for my hubby, some of them are actually good!
I adore your blog and your writing!
Hi Helen,
I read you every day and love seeing your gorgeous babies grow. I admire your tenacity, and I disagree that you lack grace. You handle trials and tribulations with as much grace as anyone I “know”. You possess a wonderful ability to express your experiences and your truths.
As for me, I am a Texan born and raised, but now live in Florida with hubby #3. I finally found a keeper, although life is far from perfect.
I currently am a stay-at-home wife and mom, but taught elementary school for 13 years in Texas.
It took hubby #1 and me 4 years and a miscarriage to get my son here. He is a handsome, smart 14 year old with raging hormones. He is convinced, of course, that he is much more wordly and wise than his ultra dull and nerdy parents.
I am very close to my mother in Texas and miss her terribly. I worry that I have moved away from her just at the time when she needs me most.
I alternate between wanting to go back to work, wanting to adopt a child, and wanting a wildly carefree, independent life. I feel like a woman without a plan, and this is not like me. I’m not sure I like this new person looking at me in the mirror. I thought we were supposed to get more comfortable in our skin as we age, not less!
I wish you peace, health, and career success … but mostly I wish you joy and thousands of baby belly laughs!
Thank you for sharing your world with us.
~Evelyn
Looks like I get to be # 100! Should count for something eh? I miss one day and wow! I read your blog almost every day comment sometimes. I like how I get to talk about me… I am forever the absent blogger, mother to one 6 month old, in a 6 year relationship with his father and we have our ups and downs. Right now would be a down. I have PPD (port partum depression) which I was formally diagnosed with today by a shrink and told to make an appointment in 3 weeks handed prescription for meds. I am trying to not be a downer as to not upset my partner so we can co-exist without my craziness. I am trying to be the mother my mother wasn’t. But not be overbearing. It